I am soooo bored.
I don't get depressed, I get bored. Boredom is my nemesis. "Boah, boah, boah" as Katherine Hepburn said. (Quick: name the movie.) Or technically, dysthemia, as I discussed in a previous post.
I'm one of those people who has to be working on a project. Not just a little "project," but a big life-changing absorbing overwhelming passion, or I get bored.
My bookshelves chart the projects I've been consumed with in the last twenty years: books about:
scuba
sailboats
Oregon
dog training
climbing
homebuilding
landscaping
Buddhism
adopting
child-rearing
self employment
personal growth
turning 50
and
knitting.
It's a bad sign that I can't think of any books I want to buy or check out from the library. Nothing, no project in my sights, no curiosity, i.e.: no passion.
As a long-time therapy student, I understand that "projects" are a way of distracting myself from the existentialism of life. As a Buddhist, I know I need to just sit, accept, be. But, it's so boring!!
My relationship had passion. Nothing like never-ending drama for keeping life interesting.
Eventually, another passion will make itself known. And you'll hear about it first, my faithful readers. But in the meantime, I'm really bored.
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